Whoa that was really fun for me .. I'd like to thank Melky's tooth for the opportunity in left field yesterday = ]. Bernie's alive and well bitches. So here's a bit of an Us Weekly scoop on my life .. because I know you're all dying to know. Les quietly moved back in .. and then she spent all my money on Fifth Ave the next day. How pleasing to me. Uh the kids are all fine. Except Bianca's boyfriend is pissing me off. He comes over almost everyday and when he's not here, she's over there. Little does he know I think about how I'd beat his ass in a millisecond over spaghetti at the dinner table ..That you know what better not you know what with my daughter. [SIGH] 

A lot of the boys went out on the town last nite ..Derek was being a whiny bitch in his room over Sally even though he hit 2 homers yesterday.. whatever. By the way I'm very pleased to announce Driven will be extended to lotions and other bath products *snicker*..Just kidding, I love you D. Melky was resting because of his tooth..i.e. freaking about his root canal.. I told him to just take Motrin even though its going to hurt like a little bitch anyway .. Uhh so him and I just sat in my room and watched the Emmys.. I'm very pleased that Jeremy Piven and Kiefer Sutherland both won.. I'm obsessed with those amazing shows.. Ryan Seacrest is a little floozy boy who needs to come out of the closet and fast.. Conan had a great monologue, very amusing..but God it was boring. A little controversy, puh lease? 

I wish we could play today.. now I'm gonna have to find something to do because I am not going to play male nurse to Melky.. Robby can put up with that biz. Soo if anybody wants to go out tonight with da Bern, tell me because there's no way I'm coming home to my wife yet.

[

mood

|

cold

]

Where does the brown ground come from? Green plants, a new study reveals. As plants wilt and die, their leaves and limbs drop off, bringing carbon that they've stored for a living to the soil. 

[	Current Location	|	stadium	]
[	mood	|	crazy	]
[	music	|	new york newwww york dun dun	]

GOOD JOB JORGE!!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!!

CUZ I'M FREEEEEE
FREEEEEEEE FALLLIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNN

lovjels, 

the buren 

mojitos mmmm

[	mood	|	bouncy	]
[	music	|	some barry manilow ..	]

HER NAME WAS LOLAAA
SHE WAS A SHOWGIRL!
WITH YELLOW FEATHERS 
IN HER HAIR
AND A DRESS CUT DOWN TO THERE! ...

LAST CALL FOR NEW YEAR'S PHOTO CONTEST!

DECEMBER 28TH IS THE LAST DAY.

THAT MEANS YOU, SALLY! YOU, SHAR! YOU, ANDY! YOU, DEREK! YOU, GARY! YOU, TINO! YOU, JOHNNY!

OH I FORGOT TO TELL YOU!

I'M NOT LEAVING YOU! I HAVE SIGNED A 1-YEAR CONTRACT WITH THE NEW YORK YANKEES AS A DH AND POSSIBLE BACK-UP FOR JOHNNY DAMON! WOOT!

[

mood

|

cheerful

]

First, I'd like to say thank you to everyone who participated in the New Year's picture contest. You are all winners. It was based on creativity and what I would like. It was a very hard decision but after much consideration, The winner is: No one. Because I feel a lot of you slacked off and some didn't even care to enter! Now I won't name names [JORGE!], but some of you just put a picture of yourself [MOOSE!]! That does not show Bernie the effort! Actually, I will use names and these are your GRADES:

Andy: B. You can't even spend New Years with me. Meanie.

Sally: C.

Moose: D.

Shar: F. What was that?!?

Sheff: F.

NOTE: YOU ARE ALL ALLOWED TO RE-ENTER! MUST HAVE EFFORT, CREATIVITY, AND BE BASED ON SOMETHING THAT I COULD RELATE TO OR LOVE!

DEADLINE IS DECEMBER 26TH. GOOD LUCK!